I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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