Who did Billy Mays play for?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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