i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
