I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
