There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
