Rock
Scissors
Fuck
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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