So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
only you would photoshop your dick
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Randomize
