can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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