I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
