You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
