What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
