I want to stick my p in your. b.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
