Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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