chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
