Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
