I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Duck Duck Cougar?
I'm passing your future prison.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
