That's intense
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
