Three words: puerto rican gang bang
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
