he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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