MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
soo... how was my night?
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