My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
