Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
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