I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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