i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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