he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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