PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
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