New invention idea: vibrating tampons
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
