Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
