We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
