Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
