I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Less talking, more tequila
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
