wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize