I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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