she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
