We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
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