it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
