there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
