Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize
