Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
