Im at strip club and am horny
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
