just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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