She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
