Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
