We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize