its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
