You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize