Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
