yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize