my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
