Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
